Images in my head of having to contact you and say, 'oh hey, hope you are well, I've got something to tell you...'
But what?!
My body is clearly in need, something is off and it started when it got near you.
Symptoms are just symptoms but when put against fact and Internet all I get is confusion.
So I went to someone who might know, they do not know.
I tried the dreaded test, it said horizontal my ass, goody goody, cries on carpet but somehow I question accuracy and lack of certain substances within.
Fuck.
I wish it was clear.
Still waiting on other tests, I'm in here cuddled up, shooting hopes out on a whim and it's nothing big it can't be. I'm not that stupid am I?
So she said maybe it's you being pissed off, what are you anxious about?
So much.
And it could be that but neon orange is flooding now, maybe it's just reflex, maybe something more, but I'd really like to know and I'd really not like to have to finish that sentence to you...
No, no.
If I call you it will be for pleasure not for business.
And let's keep it that way.
Learning always, I'm so awed by the compassion, wondering what will be, but worrying certainly won't change it.
No, it never does and we always assume the worst anyways, now don't we?
But what?!
My body is clearly in need, something is off and it started when it got near you.
Symptoms are just symptoms but when put against fact and Internet all I get is confusion.
So I went to someone who might know, they do not know.
I tried the dreaded test, it said horizontal my ass, goody goody, cries on carpet but somehow I question accuracy and lack of certain substances within.
Fuck.
I wish it was clear.
Still waiting on other tests, I'm in here cuddled up, shooting hopes out on a whim and it's nothing big it can't be. I'm not that stupid am I?
So she said maybe it's you being pissed off, what are you anxious about?
So much.
And it could be that but neon orange is flooding now, maybe it's just reflex, maybe something more, but I'd really like to know and I'd really not like to have to finish that sentence to you...
No, no.
If I call you it will be for pleasure not for business.
And let's keep it that way.
Learning always, I'm so awed by the compassion, wondering what will be, but worrying certainly won't change it.
No, it never does and we always assume the worst anyways, now don't we?
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